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Wealth and children are the adornment of earthly life, a deposit given by Allah. Accountable to Almighty Allah regarding this deposit. Rasul (pbuh) said, know! Each of you is responsible; And each of you will be asked about your subordinates. (Bukhari, Hadith: 7138).
So we should try our best to make the child a virtuous child. Following are the Quranic guidelines for having children:
Maintaining a friendly relationship with the child: In order to raise the child properly, one must maintain a friendly relationship with him. So that he can freely talk to his parents about any problem. In this case, the child can be protected from many wrong decisions and dangers with proper guidance. Yusuf (a.s.) discussed the dream with his father, who forbade him to discuss the dream with anyone. The Holy Qur'an states, 'When Yusuf said to his father, 'O my father, I saw eleven stars, the sun and the moon, I saw them prostrate before me. (Surah: Yusuf, verse: 4).
Warn the child: Children are less experienced about life, so the father should warn them about this difficult world, instruct them to avoid the path where there is danger. For example, Yusuf's father warned him. Ershad, his father said, 'O my son! Do not narrate your dreams to your brothers. If you do, they will plot against you. Satan is the open enemy of man. (Surah: Yusuf, verse: 5).
Advising the future of the child: Realizing that every human being has some potential, he can be successful if he is trained and encouraged in that sector. A father should educate his child as well as encourage him about his potential. The Holy Qur'an states, 'Thus (as you saw in a dream) your Lord will choose you, teach you the interpretation of dreams, and He will fulfill His favor upon you and upon the family of Jacob, as He fulfilled it before upon your forefathers Abraham and Isaac, verily. Your Lord is All-Knowing, All-Wise. (Surah: Yusuf, verse: 6).
Maintaining equality between children: Maintaining equality in caring for children and spending on them. So that they do not develop hatred towards each other. For example, when the brothers of Yusuf (a.s.) thought that their father was loving Yusuf (a.s.) a little too much, they conspired to kill him. It is mentioned in the Holy Qur'an, 'Remember when they (the brothers) were saying, 'Surely Yusuf and his (brother) are dearer to our father than us, while we are a whole group, our father is in clear error. Kill Yusuf or cast him into a land, then the eyes of your father will be on you, after that you will become good people. (Surah: Yusuf, verses: 8-9).
Note, here it can never be said that Yaqub (a.s.) did not maintain equality among his children, rather he loved all his children. But since Allah had special instructions about Yusuf (A.S.), He tried to keep him separate from everyone to keep him safe.
Giving them opportunities for sports: Children need sports for their mental and physical development, so they should be given opportunities for sports. This is why Yakub (A.S.) sent his son Yusuf (A.S.) to the field to play with his brother. It is mentioned in the Holy Qur'an, 'They said, O our father! No matter whether you believe us about Yusuf, we are surely his well-wishers. Send him with us tomorrow, he will have fun and play, we will take good care of him. (Surah: Yusuf, verses: 11-12).
Keeping away from Shirk: The Holy Qur'an says, 'Remember when Luqman admonished his son and said - O son! Do not associate anything with Allah, Shirk is surely a great injustice. ’ (Surah: Luqman, verse: 13).
Giving initiation to the service of parents: Because it is the command of Almighty Allah. The Holy Qur'an says, "I have commanded man to be kind to his parents." His mother bore him through hardship after hardship. He was weaned at two years, (commanding) to be grateful to Me and to your parents. To Me is the return (of all of you). If your parents pressure you to choose a partner of which you have no knowledge, you do not obey them. But will live with them in peace on earth. Whoever turns to me will follow his path. Then to Me is your return. Then I will tell you what you were doing. (Surah: Luqman, verses: 14-15).
Teaching Gratitude: In the mentioned verse, Almighty Allah says, 'Be grateful to Me and your parents. From here it can be understood that teaching gratitude to children is also important.
Teaching regular prayer: It is mentioned in the Holy Qur'an, 'O children! You establish the prayer. ...' (Sura: Luqman, verse: 17).
Commanding good deeds, teaching to prevent evil deeds: It is mentioned in the Holy Qur'an, "... enjoin righteous deeds, and forbid evil deeds..." (Surah: Luqman, verse: 17).
Teaching patience: It is the father's responsibility to teach patience in situations where trusting in Allah. It is said, '...and be patient in times of danger. Surely it is a work of determination. (Surah:Luqman, verse: 17).
Keeping away from pride and arrogance: 'Do not despise people because of pride, and do not walk proudly in the world, surely Allah does not like a proud arrogant person. (Surah: Luqman, verse: 18).
Encouraging moderate living: In the Holy Qur'an, Almighty Allah says, 'Be moderate in your movements and lower your voice. Among the voices, the donkey's voice is the most melodious. (Surah: Luqman, verse: 19).
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